Oooh, Oooh, It's a Money Taboo

I shall now talk about money. Something that I've noticed that poor(er) people have no trouble talking about, but rich people NEVER talk about. I'm a poor(er) person. So I lay it all out there. I just don't care. I'm not sure what the reason is for the rich money talking taboo, but perhaps it is that whole faux meritocracy thing where richer people are more likely to equate money with success and self-worth, and poor(er) people know that not to be true of themselves. We struggle, we know others struggle. It is all the good fight that we all work at, and in the end it is not what we are.

So it's January. Which means I have to look at the next years budget. And I'm also being forced to think about preschool in January because aparently it is harder to get into preschool than college, and Emmie has me thinking (more on that in a sec), and the 'tax rebate' has me thinking as well. (Click on the above graphic to find out more sustainable and productive things to do with your rebate than consume it on crap you don't need.)

So Emmie and a growing number of people are striking out against the notion that a growing economy of stuff and debt can sustain itself by resolving not to buy anything new for a year. (Food and a few other things excepted. Like, toilet paper and underwear come to mind.) Emmie, who rocks anyway cuz she bucks the convention by not owning a TV and by having her own egg-laying chickens, is going to document her progress on her blog. I think this is a wonderful idea, and something that folks with less means have been doing for necessities sake. It is really nice to see people with at least some means doing it for all the right reasons.  I need to do it more for both reasons, although I'm just going to take little steps and not say "a year!" --more like a month at a time.

So, here is the preliminary budget. Yes, I'm going to show it to you. This is how I live on $32K a year with two children. Things to know:

• D and I essentially have separate financials. But it is very informal in that sometimes I buy the groceries, sometimes he does. Big, fixed bills we do on our own, little stuff is just whoever.
• I'm blacking out certain information, not so much because I care if you know where my income comes from, but I'm not sure my employers would want you to know specifics like that. Don't want to be dooced, so better safe than sorry. Also other blacked out info is just identifying things.
• Some of my income is from SSDI. Until you have walked in my shoes, gone to my job interviews, been denied coverage due to preexistings and been fearful for your life and health when you had no medical insurance, sacrificed your job to help your husband/partner live and be kept out of a nursing home when there is no other medical help available to access, and lost your vision and hearing on the job whilst nearing a deadline you can't complete because your alternatives are vanishing before your eyes...you don't get to say anything about that. Right now, SSDI is the best, most secure way to insure that me and my kids have some sort of income and medical care. You will notice that I still pay quite a bit for insurance premiums. If we ever get universal healthcare in this country, we'll talk. Until then, if you have a problem with it, STFU.
• This is the projected budget in a worst case scenerio sense. Certain decisions haven't come to pass yet, such as preschool, what classes the kids might take (tumbling, etc.), and what formal curriculum (if any) I use for them next year.
• Yes there is porky fat in it. Yes some of it has to go. Those decisions have yet to be made.
• What isn't even on there is stupid purchases that I don't really need to make. Like pizza delivery  or impulse music or book purchases. I do do these things, but I will go for weeks or months and not do them, and then binge on stupid purchases for a few weeks. Sure, every once in a while I deserve a dinner out...but I'd like to not let my checking account hit Zero and instead take some of the surplus and put it in savings.
• I do have some savings. I have a money market account and a retirement account. They probably don't have as much money in them as yours does, but they do exist.
• I'm lucky to have no debt. I did have student loans and some credit card debt coming out of college but a) I was lucky to have recieved a lot of financial aid for college; b) I took, ahem, NINE YEARS to get a bachelors and masters, mainly because I worked every semester, took a light course load and paid expenses as I went, c) when I started working, I paid off my loans/cards in huge chunks, like $500/month, and d) I have one credit card for emergencies, I haven't used it since 1999. Yes, I am the dreaded "deadbeat" credit card holder. My psyche can't tolerate debt, but I'm not judging those who can/do. I can see the draw.
• As you can see, I am extremely fortunate to have great rent. The trade off of this is that I don't own my own home and  I LIVE WITH MY DAD. I haven't decided yet how fair of a trade-off that is. It depends on the day.

So here it is: Budget (ptf). I will probably not have this up very long. But my purpose in displaying it is that I think it is okay to talk about money, it is much easier if you understand that it doesn't define you nor is there one right way for everyone to manage it. And I am always curious as to how others spend and save. What they pay for groceries, preschool, etc. How they save money, what they sacrifice and what they won't give up. What would you do in my situation? What do you think I'm doing that's outlandish? Or good? I'm not going to take it personally if I disagree with you...we are all different. I'm showing you mine, so you show me yours. (Okay, you don't have to do it in as much detail, but let me know some of your thoughts on budgeting in general.) Also, there is a preschool post coming up and financial stuff is a big part of that.

Oh, and my big, ridiculous $300 tax "rebate" will probably go into savings, if I even get one...I think I might not make enough?

Oh! I just have to share this with you. It is related to sustainability. Today I stopped at Walgreens and they gave me a few canvas grocery bags in an effort to reduce the use of plastic bags. And the clerk put my bags in a plastic bag! Before I could say anything, she was talking to the next costumer. I thought that was hilarious.

Comments

[Emmie (Better Make It A Double)]

Interesting stuff, and hilarious about the plastic Walgreens bags. Walgreens used to get a lot of my impulse shopping dollars for some reason. FWIW, we don't make that much more than you even with 2 incomes for four people, and pay a lot more in "rent" (mortgage, in our case). That, plus higher medical premiums plus student loans and the actual costs of maintaining a home, significant monthly medical expenses, and you and I are of pretty equivalent "means". We've also been buying mostly used out of necessity for some time, but just as you are, we're finding that we both can and need to do even better. Even $200 per month is going to be a real stretch for us next year, and we've never been able to afford daycare of any kind even though that's been a real stretch with the amount we work. I agree that it's important to talk frankly about money. I've been following your posts about exploring homeschooling with interest, because I agree with so much of what you say, but part of me can't wait to have he childcare be partly taken care of so I can work a few more hours and take the pressure off a little financially. I don't always write in detail about the financial stressors because I know that it would bum my spouse out. he reads my blog, and I don't want him to feel like he should work even more than he already does.

[fridawrites]

I'm new to reading your blog, but I have to say you have the cutest twins ever. You spend your money very wisely. What challenges us are large medical expenses despite insurance.

Are you budgeting an allowance for yourself each month for the small impulse pleasures you enjoy (books, pizza, music)? That can be an alternative to going cold turkey on consumer goods and make you feel that you can enjoy yourself--only you know when you've reached that monthly limit, that's it. We've found it helps. Most recently, we've not been buying except for gifts or immediate need, but at some points the occasional extra has really been enjoyed--you appreciate/value the purchase more when you've saved for it, but you also remove the guilt when it's accounted for in your budget.

It looks like you have a handle on it. The only thing that jumped out to me was the US Bank fees, is that for your saveings/checking? If it is you may find it worth your time to find a bank (or credit union) that doesn't charge fees.

As for my budget, I spend a fair bit of time thinking about it, even if I don't post or talk about it much! I enjoy owning my own home, but the downside is we had to pay to get our well repaired this winter, and we're going into some serious debt this summer to replace the rotted out roof. I am very glad "the bank of Dad" is going to give us a low rate loan. So join me in saying - We will make it, we will make it...

[Angela]

I get ssdi because I am blind and will soon lose that because I started working. I only get $160 a month from that. No one can live on that. I live in Northern Virginia and it costs so much to live here. The government doesn’t figure in area that you live in into how much you get to make at your job. Sucks. I am lucky though because my husband has health insurance. You are doing well with what you make.
Budgeting is so hard!

[witchtrivets]

Long-time lurker here. I obsess over expenses and read the money blogs everyday. I get a lot of good info on saving money from WiseBread and sometimes info on deals from Consumerist. I do think as a society we need to talk more about money -- not talking about it is what got us into the state we are in now. I agree with fridawrites -- you should budget in fun money even if it is just a little bit. Bundling your internet/TV/cell phone should help -- there are many possible options for this, you can just call and ask the provider. In our household, we don't have Cable but Netflix is not negotiable. We must have it.

[baggage]

I am always impressed by how together you have it. I like the idea of not spending money on new things for a year. I'm off to read more about it.