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September 27, 2007

I'm probably the only one who thinks this is funny.

Someday I will go off on my rant about how the study of "Economics" as a "Science" at the University level is a total crock of fascist shit that  has the singular goal of turning young accounting majors into cult capitalist Stepford drones. But for now, I present to you what I found when doing a search for "training pants" on Amazon:

The 2007-2012 Outlook for Toilet Training Pants in Greater China (Paperback)
by Philip M. Parker

Our Price: $495
Number of pages: 139

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Book Description
This study covers the latent demand outlook for toilet training pants across the regions of Greater China, including provinces, autonomous regions (Guangxi, Nei Mongol, Ningxia, Xinjiang, Xizang - Tibet), municipalities (Beijing, Chongqing, Shanghai, and Tianjin), special administrative regions (Hong Kong and Macau), and Taiwan (all hereafter referred to as “regions”). Latent demand (in millions of U.S. dollars), or potential industry earnings (P.I.E.) estimates are given across some 1,100 cities in Greater China. For each major city in question, the percent share the city is of the region and of Greater China is reported. Each major city is defined as an area of “economic population”, as opposed to the demographic population within a legal geographic boundary. For many cities, the economic population is much larger that the population within the city limits; this is especially true for the cities of the Western regions. For the coastal regions, cities which are close to other major cities or which represent, by themselves, a high percent of the regional population, actual city-level population is closer to the economic population (e.g. in Beijing). Based on this “economic” definition of population, comparative benchmarks allow the reader to quickly gauge a city’s marketing and distribution value vis-à-vis others. This exercise is quite useful for persons setting up distribution centers or sales force strategies. Using econometric models which project fundamental economic dynamics within each region and city of influence, latent demand estimates are created for toilet training pants. This report does not discuss the specific players in the market serving the latent demand, nor specific details at the product level. The study also does not consider short-term cyclicalities that might affect realized sales. The study, therefore, is strategic in nature, taking an aggregate and long-run view, irrespective of the players or products involved.

September 25, 2007

All Cats Go To....??

Conversation #1: (every time my dad leaves town.)

Aaron: Where'd Grampa Fred go?

Me: (Big signing hand gestures and drama). He took the train to the airport...

...and got on an airplane...

...and flew up in the sky...

...and flew all the way back to Kansas!

Conversation #2:

Aaron: Where'd Scrapper go?

Me: Scrapper died and went away to Heaven* like Grandma Diane and Mara did. We will miss her, won't we?

Conversation #3: (With the storybook lady at the Children's Museum who just finished a book about cats.)

Storybook lady: Does anyone here have a cat at home?

Aaron: I have a Kai and a Scrapper at home.

SL: You do? You have two kitty-cats?

Aaron: Scrapper died and went to the airplane up in the sky to Kansas!

SL: Scrapper went where?

Aaron: (irritated by having to repeat himself says annoyingly loud) Scrapper DIED! Scrapper in KANSAS! We will MISS HER!!!

Me: He's getting a couple different stories confused, there.

SL: Oh! Thank goodness. I'd hate to think that when we die we go to Kansas.

Me: Amen to that.

*Yeah, UUs, I know. What would you say to a two-year-old? Its just a concrete word for now, they can decide what it means to themselves as they get older.

September 20, 2007

Am suffering a HUGE, MASSIVE, MEGALITHIC, GINORMOUS Sleep Debt That Renders Me Unable to Form Paragraphs

...but I can manage miscellaneous pictures:

New_beds_001 One of the reasons for my lack of sleep. Naim in his new bed. Naim has decided he doesn't need naps and Aaron has decided to entertain himself by poking me while I sleep at all hours.

New_beds_005Aaron faking sleep.

New_beds_006Naim humoring me by pretending he is going to stay in bed all night.

Oxbow_001_2 I found these school lunch trays on sale for $3 and I got nostalgic for those good ole' perfectly dome shaped public school mashed potatoes. The kids think they're the greatest thing since sippy cups.

Oxbow_003The next several pics are from a little day trip we took to a state park on the other side of town. The kids are so into PICNIC! PICNIC! that everytime they see a picnic table they sit down and demand food. Luckily, today I was prepared.

Oxbow_005One challenge we have is finding accessible trails that we all can go on. Doesn't always work out. Here, Naim and D take the (very empty) road while Aaron and I go searching for trails. (Ah! But one of the advantages of park visits via wheelchair? See how I'm using him as my pack mule?)

Oxbow_007 Found a semi accessible trail. Naim has his walking stick while Aaron forges ahead at Aaron speed.

Oxbow_008 Aaron forgets that trees come in sizes larger than suburban tract housing 15 feet.

Oxbow_009 Naim checking out the tree with Aaron. In these pics they look like typical Portland teenage boys. Oversized muted colored layered slouchiness.

Oxbow_012Aaron is majorly pissed off in this picture. He broke the "Stay together" rule and ran off and didn't listen to the "stop" rule so he got benched for a bit.

Oxbow_022Naim made friends with this very brave squirrel. It was kind of cool because on Tuesday we spent some time reading about and talking about squirrels.

Oxbow_034Naim never got to actually touch the squirrel but it did eat right out of his hands.

Oxbow_070Naim sitting around waiting for us all to load up back into the car.

Oxbow_067Bye-Bye, Squirrel!!! (X 100)

September 18, 2007

(Please Indulge My) Ode To Scrapper

Our 4 year-old cat, Scrapper, died tonight. She has been in "hospice" for the past 6 or so weeks due to a mysterious illness that was most likely some form of lymphatic cancer. I really, really liked Scrapper. She was such a funny cat.

0034 Scrapper. (She is white on her underside. Her back and sides had this mysterious swirly tan tortoise shell over black and grey specks. When she put her arms and legs together, the patterns matched and continued on the other side. Her left eye was cloudy, but fairly normal looking. Her right eye was always closed more and did not look like it had a normal pupil.)

In 2003, I was home to Kansas for a visit with my terminally ill mother when a neighbor came to the door. They knew that we had a cat in the house (my sister's cat) and wondered if she had had a litter of kittens (no HE hadn't) because there was a litter up in the crawl space under their house. My sister and I and another neighbor went over to see this cute litter of kittens. Several of which had closed or deformed and gunky eyes. Seriously, when you are home stuck in the house of your dying mother...even when you are trying to make the best of it...everything feels like dread. Finding the litter of kittens was just the only bright point of the visit. They brought me a little dose of happiness.

00330 Me and Scrap getting reacquainted on her first night in Oregon.

I had to leave, and my sister and the neighbor, Cindy, launched into a project of saving all these cats, and controlling the feral cat population by trapping the ferals, spaying/neutering and vaccinating them, and then releasing them. The mothers who had kittens were trapped and stayed on the back screen porch of Cindy's house until the litters could be weaned and the kittens could be adopted out. Cindy had three litters of kittens and their accompanying mama cats on her porch for months.

0026 Scrapper getting lovey-doveys from Kai.

I went back to Kansas a few more times that year. My mother died and I went back after her death for three weeks. The only thing even remotely good about that time was that I got to go over to Cindy's back porch and visit the cats. Scrapper was an unusual looking cat. She was sort of tortoise shell swirly and she had one deformed eye. Cindy and my sister had really gone the extra mile for Scrapper and a couple of other sickly kittens. She had ring worm and lost all of her hair at some point. She had feline respiratory disease, and she had herpes of the eye. Scrapper was so good natured during all of her treatments that Cindy gave her the name "Scrapper."

0042 Scrappers life overlapped my guide dog, Mara's life by a few months. They got along, but were not best friends.

In February of the next year, all of the cats were gone off the back porch except for Scrapper and one other cat that Cindy was keeping for herself. Scrapper came to Oregon. My father brought her out here on a plane. But he had put her in the dog, Abbey's, soft carry-on bag. Big mistake. When my dad walked in to our apartment with Scrapper, the carry-on had silver duct tape wrapped all around it where Scrapper had ripped into it. Scrapper's head was sticking out of a hole in the bag and my dad had wrapped his coat around it trying to keep her contained. He had bandages all over his hands that the flight attendants had put on all the scratches she inflicted on him. It was rather hilarious. My dad still hasn't completely recovered from that flight.

47b5d902b3127cce92aa4d9b0f6a0000001 Scrapper and Aaron copying each other, spread eagle on the floor.

Scrapper was a little goofy. A little off. My sister strongly suspects that her father was also her grandfather. So there was a bit of in breading going on. And part of it was her poor eyesight. She would just get into these hilarious predicaments. She would jump up on the TV and promptly walk right off the back of it. Then she would be stuck down behind the TV. She could have just walked out the side, but she couldn't figure that out. She would meow until we came to save her.

47b5d902b3127cce92aa48c0ce9b0000001 Scrapper sharing the gymini with the babies.

Sometimes our other cat, Kai would come save her. Kai would help her out a lot. If Scrapper got stuck somewhere and meowed, sometimes D couldn't reach her and he would send Kai back to get her. Kai would go back and poke on her a bit and lead her out of wherever she was stuck.

When we moved into separate households, we tried to separate Scrapper and Kai. D took Kai and I took Scrapper. Scrapper was having none of that. She had such trouble at my house without Kai to give her the confidence she needed to get around. Or maybe it was just kitty companionship. In any case, I was on bed-rest and weeks away from delivery, so we all moved to D's house. After the kids were born, D had gotten so attached to her, and I was overwhelmed with kid duty, that she and Kai stayed at his place (except during the long hospitalizations, in which they both came to live with us.)

Img_1181small I remember when I first saw the cats after having the twins, the cats looked HUGE. Twelve pounds of cat was heavy after being used to five pound babies.

Kai could care less about my kids, but Scrapper always engaged with them. And also put up with a fair share of abuse. She liked to sit in their stroller. Sometimes she would let them push her around the living room in it. She would also ride around in D's wheelchair with him. She wouldn't walk to the kitchen herself to eat, she would jump on D and meow until he gave her taxi service there and dropped her off.

D has a wheelchair that he can tilt back and recline a bit in the seat. The whole seat tilts, so he is still in the 90-90 sitting position, but tilted. She would meow for him to tilt back his chair so she could sit in the crook of his lap and lay on his chest. She liked to sleep on your chest at night, too.

Img_0587 The date on this pic is 12/6/04. A day before my kids were born. Scrap kept me company on those long, anxiety ridden bedrest days when I couldn't see.

We gave her pain medication this past month, but she did not seem to be or show that she was in much pain. She was still her same happy self. Yesterday, she suddenly stopped eating and drinking and hid under D's bed for over 24 hours. We knew she was telling us that she was done. She had a way of letting you know what she wanted in no uncertain terms. We had thought of euthanizing her before now because we knew she was terminal, but she was so damned happy and content it didn't seem right. And when she was done being happy and content, she made her statement. So, we did take her to have her euthanized tonight. Very graciously, D's father sat with the (sleeping) kids while we took her in late this evening. And she was pretty calm and died right in D's lap where she belonged.

Cats_010 D holding Scrapper on his lap. This was taken a few days before she died. She went from 12 pounds to six pounds in a few weeks.

I think to myself that this cat should have been dead about a hundred times over-she would have never survived feral catdom with her 'disabilities' and would have been a tough cat to put up for adoption at a shelter- but my sister and Cindy and D and I (and even my dad) all committed to her because she was such a friendly, good-natured cat. So, she had four good years that she wouldn't have had otherwise. She had a good life, and I will miss her.

Img_0116 Scrap and I fought over who gets to use the computer chair a lot.

September 08, 2007

A Reader Asks: Why the Herds?

Note: I have had much computer/internet connectivity the past week and a half or so. I’m sure it has absolutely NOTHING to do with the fact that my father has gone crazy trying to get his wireless to work by screwing around with my router as if he knows what he is doing. Anyway, he leaves tomorrow and I think we are back online. I owe a few of you emails and I haven’t forgotten.

So,

Shannon

writes:

I have a disability-related question for your blogging calendar:

I shop at this evil, big-box store ("Meijer" if anyone else knows it) and they seem to employ a large number of visibly disabled people. I'd say of the employees I see there on any given shopping trip, maybe half will be disabled--from cognitive disabilities to wheel-chair users, the partially paralyzed people or amputees.

Now, on the one hand, I'm all, "hey, it's nice to see so many queers in one place" (which is how I've come to think of disabled people--as my fellow queers). On the other hand, it's an evil big-box store.

Are they getting slave labor from some evil government program or what?

I don't expect you to actually know a 100% accurate answer to my question, but I figured you could speculate with authority.

I can’t say with specificity what is going on there. Half seems awfully high so I would assume some kind of community/government agency is involved. That may be good or bad, depending on many factors. Here is a quick and dirty abridged speculation on why many times you might see people with disabilities working in packs.

Sometimes, in some communities, there will be a sort of glut of people with disabilities working in one place because of a manager or HR person that for whatever reason has a vested interest in the disabled community. They may have a disability themselves or have a relative that is disabled and actively recruit disabled employees. Word gets around and then a lot get hired.

Another thing that happens sometimes is that one or two disabled people “break in” to an employer and get the accommodations all set up, paving the way for others. An example of this happened in

Omaha

at the Marriot Hotel chain reservation centers. A couple of visually impaired people beat down the doors and had software engineers develop the reservation software that they could use. Then, a whole bunch of other folks got on board and took advantage of the new technology.

There are also a few programs like the Randolph-Sheppard Act which give preferential bidding to the disabled for jobs in government. The classic example is visually impaired vendors. Many federal and state government buildings have vending machines or cafeterias and food stands that are managed by people with vision impairments. They apply to manage the stands and machines and get affirmative bidding privileges. The interesting thing about this, I’ve always mused, is that vending is a job that deals with many things that people don’t think visually impaired people can do. You deal with a lot of merchandise and have to keep inventory, you have to get that inventory from place to place yourself without a car, there is considerable foot travel involved sometimes, there is cooking and food prep, and you are dealing with large sums of cash that you have to account for and handle. There are many, many successful blind vendors out there, many of which handle multiple locations and machines and cafeterias and workers and such, which is great. But I wish the private sector would look at their success in this area as an example of how productive they could be in other competitive jobs.

Then there are a slew of community and government programs that “broker” jobs for disabled people. These programs can be great, or they can be kind of screw-y and underhanded. There are many ways that they go about it. Sometimes, they just go in and do the advocating on behalf of a potential employee as sort of a front person or placement specialist. This works well for someone who can be a great, oh—I don’t know—file clerk but is a lousy interview. And also, someone can be a great file clerk and a great interview, but they still need an able bodied person to go in and pave the way for them. It sucks and I resent this, but it is true.

Sometimes, there is no current open job that a disabled person can do, so a broker who is experienced in job development goes to a potential employer and tries to get them to ‘create’ a job. This isn’t a pretend job, it is usually a job carved out from several other jobs. For example, a company might have an opening for a secretary. The job description includes typing letters, answering the phone, filing, photocopying, shredding paper, hole-punching and binding, etc. So, a job developer has a client who can do all but type letters and answer the phone. The job developer tries to convince the employer to rearrange the job description to fit the client with a disability. For example, the disabled person could do all the photocopying, filing, shredding, hole-punching and binding for three current secretaries. Then the three current secretaries would have more time available to handle the additional calls and letter writing. To me, this is only fair if the disabled employee gets a competitive wage. Sometimes, to seal the deal, the job developer says, well you’ll only have to pay my client minimum wage, when you’d be hiring a whole new secretary for $12.00 an hour or whatever. The thing is, you pay secretaries $12/hr. to hole- punch and photocopy currently, even though it isn’t their whole job. The disabled person should get the same rate of pay even though they have carved out an “easier” job. The secretaries are usually quite happy to dump the scut work anyway, so no one loses if everyone is paid accordingly.

A disabled employee might also have a “job coach” that works along side them. The job coach helps them train for the job or helps with some part of the job that they can’t do. Sometimes the job coach is just temporary (but longer than a person would usually be in training, say three to six months or longer), or sometimes the job coach is permanent. Sometimes a permanent job coach just monitors and problem solves with the employee and employer, but doesn’t directly work side by side with them every day. There are many different possible arrangements. Again, if the employee is getting a competitive wage and the job coach is being paid by an outside source (such as a community voc rehab or disability organization) well, fine. But sometimes they arrange the wage to be split among the job coach and the employee. The employee gets less than minimum wage, and the job coach gets what is left over plus a supplement from the disability/voc rehab organization. So, job coach does half the job and gets a full wage, but employee does half the job and gets a substandard wage. Again, not fair.

I will mention here that I’ve heard that a lot of self advocates with cognitive disabilities are sick to death of the whole “greeter” shtick that goes on at a lot of big box stores. The job is mainly pretend, most of them don’t really do anything (offer directions or assistance or something), they are mostly a PR prop that says to customers, “see how nice we are? We allow this Disabled Special Person to smile at you. We are a great company because we make you feel warm inside!” Also, there is a saying that all people with cognitive disabilities are allowed to do is “food, floors, and flowers,” They talk of being tired of being placed in the McBusboy, janitorial, and greenhouse jobs so enough already and they want to branch out to something more creative. This is when you have a mediocre job broker vs. a really good and creative one. Another reason disabled folks sometimes work in packs is because job coaches get really comfortable with just a few employers and place everyone there. Or place many people together so they can share a job coach. The more people can get out there and be seen doing different kinds of productive work that they enjoy, the better.

As you have probably guessed, I strongly believe in competitive employment for people with disabilities, and I strongly believe that includes competitive wages. A day’s work is a day’s work and all people need and deserve a living wage. Now, when people cry “oh, but that’s not fair to the poor corporations!” Believe me, I’m crying for the poor, wittle corporations right along with you. How can they possibly afford to give a few disabled employees that might be a little slow or a little less productive a competitive wage when they could easily hire a nondisabled person who can work faster and easier for that lousy $6 bucks an hour? Maybe they can get it from their CEOs who are getting company cars and huge perks and having their assistants do their comp dry cleaning and errand running while they are roaming the country in private jets and having $500 ‘business dinners’ and buying executive ‘gifts’ with their no credit limit company black American express cards? Unless we are talking about a really small mom and pop joint, the money is there to pay decent wages to disabled folks. (Ironically here, the same corporate big wigs who bitch about the

ADA

and hiring the disabled for competitive wages are the same ones who bitch about entitlement programs such as SSI, yet then want the government to bail their corporations out of bankruptcy. And that catch-22 is called oppression, young onions.)

And that is sufficed to say that the vast majority of disabled folks, when appropriately accommodated are, in fact, more productive than their nondisabled counterparts. They usually have less absenteeism and turnover and are very committed to the job. The only exceptions to the productivity rule are usually when hiring folks with rather significant cognitive or physical disabilities. Not your run of the mill wheelchair users or amputees or whatnot.

I sometimes resent the fact that disabled people (mostly those with cognitive disabilities or more significant physical disabilities) have to have a nondisabled person represented by a “charitable organization” broker a job for them. Quite frankly, if I were to go out right now looking for a 9 to 5, that is what I would need at this point. There are very few job openings I could just pick up off the classifieds and go interview for anymore. So why can’t I advocate for myself and go in and carve out my own job? I could, but often that puts me in the position of looking like I’m vying for “special treatment,” and/or that I’m not a serious applicant for the job. I need a nondisabled third party that can be the go-between for negiations and give my run for the job the credibility of a “charitable organization” backing and pretty, feel good packaging.  That is the world we live in right now. And even for the brokers, things are tough out there. My ex-boss was a broker of sorts (she brokered for brokers, if you will), and she had horror stories of being laughed right out of corporate HR offices for even wasting their time with the notion that they would lower themselves to hire the disabled. I won’t mention any names [coughNIKEcough], but I guess if that is what it takes to get people out there and working, that’s where we are right now.

I think most people with disabilities would agree that the worst situation is the sheltered workshop scam. This is where disabled people are really getting exploited. Now someone is going to write to me and say, “Hey, my son works in a sheltered workshop and he loves it and he is protected and it is the only thing he can do and he gets a little cash so what is wrong with you?” I understand this is the reality that some people live with and I don’t blame anyone for doing what they have to do to survive or make due.  But that doesn’t make it a good thing, just the sorry best we’ve got for some people right now. And I think that it is a sad state of affairs when we warehouse folks and make them do menial repetitive tasks for sub minimum wage while mostly passing on their wages to low bid contractors or to service providers.

If you are unfamiliar, sheltered workshops employ people with disabilities to do mostly assembly line work. (But not always, hidden in the back of many of your Goodwill stores are sheltered workshop employees laundering and sorting your donations for sub minimum wage.) Anyway, besides the low pay, they cannot change jobs, advance, or—many times—quit without say so from some case manager or some such. The conflict of interest is that the sheltered workshop managers get their contracts by being able to offer the lowest bid to companies. (i.e. I once knew of a workshop that assembled the little sporks and napkin packets for KFC, another one manufactured the basketball netting for Spalding).

My point is, they NEED to keep the disabled employees there and working at low wages in order to keep their low bid contracts and thus make a profit (or in the nonprofit case, keep the administration employed and afloat.) There is no incentive to train these employees to get out into the community and find some kind of more substantial competitive employment. I had a colleague with mild cognitive disabilities. She was institutionalized for most of her childhood and then transferred to a sheltered workshop. At some point, the factory foreperson (a nondisabled person on full salary) quit suddenly. My colleague took on the job as acting foreperson for several months and handled the job quite successfully. However, when it came time to apply for a new foreperson, her application could not be accepted because she was a sheltered workshop employee and could not advance into the pay scale of the nondisabled supervisory role. So, in essence, here is where it really is slavery, or at the very least, exploited labor.

In general, I think any time there are people with disabilities working in visible ways in the community in competitive jobs along side nondisabled colleagues (for fair wages—inasmuch as they are fair for anyone); it is probably a good thing. Evil big box store issues aside, it is where we are right now and hopefully it is a stepping stone for more equitable working conditions to come.